Smile
by KelseyO
Summary: Quinn asks Shelby for five minutes alone with Beth.  Oneshot.


**So this kind of came out of nowhere. I just needed to fix Quinn in the context of her brokenness over Beth. I didn't put nearly as much effort into this as I have been for Pink because I was just gonna put it on tumblr, but I doubt anyone on there is going to care about this so I figured I would post it here too. Lemme know what you think.**

Quinn stands in front of the door for two minutes and thirty-seven seconds before she finally raises her fist and knocks. Her heart skips a beat at the sound of footsteps and a baby crying. _Her_ baby crying.

Shelby opens the door and her expression immediately changes to one of suspicion and distrust; Quinn can hardly blame her. She opens her mouth to speak but the woman cuts her off.

"What do you want?"

Quinn takes a deep breath. "I'm sorry. For everything I did. I was stupid and irresponsible, and you didn't deserve any of it." She makes sure to look her square in the eye. "I am so, so sorry."

Shelby doesn't react for a moment, but then finally nods once. "Okay."

"I was wondering…" Quinn begins, and she can see the woman bracing herself for whatever she's about to say next. "I was wondering if I could just have a few minutes with Beth." She hesitates. "Alone."

Shelby's jaw clenches. "I don't think that's—"

"Please," Quinn, failing to keep her voice even like she wanted to. "I know I screwed up, but just…please, let me be alone with her." The dark brown eyes in front of her are not convinced. "She's my baby. I won't—I would _never_ hurt her. You can trust me."

Shelby sighs, staring her down for a long moment, and finally steps aside, allowing Quinn to pass. Her body drifts toward the playpen like a magnet and when her gaze falls on the tiny body looking up at her, she lets out the breath she didn't show she was holding.

Shelby comes up beside her, arms crossed. "I'm going to run to the post office to mail a package. I'll be back in five minutes." She gives Quinn a don't-screw-this-up look before grabbing her purse and heading out the door.

She turns back to the playpen where Beth's eyes are on her, the hazel irises identical to Quinn's. She reaches down and picks her up, her movements slow and cautious so she gets everything right, and holds her against her chest. Beth's warmth seeps into her as she takes in her daughter's face—her perfect ears, her button nose, her long eyelashes, the wispy curls of her hair.

Quinn uses the side of her thumb to gently caress Beth's cheek, and her skin is impossibly soft; she's never felt anything like it. She starts to rock her a bit, swaying side to side, the way she's seen women do it on television shows, but Beth seems unamused.

She sighs and decides to just hold her, to savor this feeling of her daughter fitting so perfectly in her arms, because she knows she'll probably never get the chance again. Beth's weight feels amazing against her, feels so right against her chest, and now she understands exactly what she's been missing for the past year.

A song drifts into her head, and she ignores it at first, but then she realizes _what_ song it is, and she actually laughs a little because this never used to happen before she joined Glee club. Without any conscious decision on her part the words begin pouring softly from her lips.

_I just want you to know_

_I've found a reason for me_

_To change who I used to be_

_A reason to start over new_

_And the reason is you_

As she sings, Beth leans back and looks directly into Quinn's eyes, almost like she's carefully observing her. She brings her tiny hand up to Quinn's mouth and her fingertips latch onto her bottom lip.

_I've found a reason to show_

_A side of me you didn't know_

_A reason for all that I do_

_And the reason is you_

When she finishes she leans in and kisses Beth's forehead. After she pulls back, there's a single beat before her daughter smiles an enormous, open-mouthed smile that shows off her lack of teeth, and Quinn can't help but follow suit. The corners of her lips pull upward and her cheeks stretch and she can't remember for the life of her the last time she really smiled like this.

She kisses her forehead again and then gives her a peck on the nose, and this time Beth giggles. The sound sends chills down Quinn's spine; this is the first time she's ever heard her baby laugh. Tears spring into her eyes because she's actually doing this, she's making her child smile and laugh, making her happy.

Quinn takes the hand that's hanging onto her lip and holds it in her own, and her smile doubles in size when she feels Beth squeeze her thumb with that incredible baby strength that people are always talking about. Sniffing back the moisture in her eyes, she kisses Beth's hand.

"You are perfect," she whispers, "and you always will be."

The door opens behind her and she almost flinches at the noise. She turns around and Shelby does a double-take.

"I've never seen her smile like that," she says, tilting her head. "I mean, she obviously smiles…a lot, actually…just, never quite like that."

Quinn's heart swells with pride. Beth is smiling like this because of _her_.

"Come to think of it, I've never seen _you_ smile like that, either."

She looks down at Beth, completely content in her arms. "I haven't had a reason to."

Shelby smiles softly. "Do you mind if I take her back?"

Quinn's throat thickens just a little but she nods and hands Beth over. Again, that feeling that something is missing returns, but she shoves it aside. "Thank you," she says, and she means it.

"You're welcome." Quinn watches as Shelby kisses Beth on the forehead, exactly how she did less than a minute ago, and it's like a punch to the gut.

She heads for the door because she doesn't know how much longer she's willing to see someone being affectionate toward her daughter. Her hand is on the knob when Shelby calls out to her.

"Quinn?"

She turns around. "Yeah?"

Shelby looks thoughtful. "You know, I've been falling behind on grading over the last week or so. Maybe you could come by tomorrow afternoon and look after Beth so I can catch up? I wouldn't actually leave, I'd just be in the next room…but you could spend some more time with her. Get to know her a bit more."

"You would…you would let me do that?"

Shelby smiles playfully. "Any time after four is good. I'll see you tomorrow, Quinn." She heads to the fridge to get some baby food and Quinn takes this as her cue to leave.

She closes the door gently behind her and sets off toward the elevator, feeling lighter than she has in months. She can still feel the ache inside her, the one that's been there since she brought Beth into the world only to give her away, but she finds that it doesn't hurt as badly as it usually does. She thinks about how these five minutes with her child have healed her just a little, and she wonders if tomorrow will heal her a little bit more.

For the first time in a very long time, she has hope.

**"The Reason" is one of the most glorious Faberry songs to ever Faberry, but I've come to like it in this context as well. Constructive criticism welcomed. Go check out Pink if you haven't already! =) [And just to reiterate, I didn't work very hard on this so don't hate me if yo u think it sucks. Just tell me how to make it better.]**


End file.
